The Flaming Crayfish's House of Gaming Quotes


"Mike is laughing without making sound. Somebody hit the 'mute' button on him."

"How could they drive him out of the forest? They don't even have a car!"

"What is he wearing?"
-- "He's wearing ... I can't think of the word ...."

"You're handcuffed."
-- "To what?"
-- "To whom?"

"One's Hermetic, one's Aesthetic, one's Celestial --"
-- "Akashic, not Aesthetic."

"When Barbara's a-rockin', don't come a-knockin'!"

"Feel the power of funk!"

"You can't learn a sphere in one hour!"

"I kicked my own ass!"

"There are lots of landmines left over from the Revolutionary War."

"I kicked him in the ribs. My work here is done."

"With every stranger, you don't know what's behind their eyes."
-- "The retinal nerve?"

"I'm allowed."
-- "You're allowed what?"
-- "She's a loud bitch!"

"It's a Quintessential core battery!"
-- "Can't get those at Radio Shack."

"If you create money, they get really pissed."
-- "Who?"
"The people who run the money."

"You post a watch."
-- "What does it look like?"
Everyone holds out their wrists. "This!"
"Where do you post it?"
-- "rec.arts.comics.misc!"

"The sun rises. It's a new day."
-- "That usually happens when the sun rises."
"Suddenly, last week appears!"

"I have a dot in contacts."
-- "No, you were given contacts. Wash 'em daily."

"What city?"
-- "Boston."
"What listing?"
-- "Chantries, Hermetic."
"The number is ... no!"

"Can I pretend to be a Geiger counter?"

"Pretend you're in game, because you are."

"A strange character walks up. He looks like a man - well, he is a man."

"You see five other people in various stages of bushiness."

After kicking the bejeezus out of a baddie.
"What's he thinking?"
-- "Ow!"

"A form jumps out of the river."
-- "A housing form?"
-- "A tax form?"
"No, far worse."
-- "A college app?"
"It's something you've only heard of in mythology."
-- "An easy college app!"
-- "One with no essays!"

"It was Bolerafin."
-- "The younger brother of Paraffin! He made candles."

"Can we knock him back in the river? Oh, no, wait, he'd just climb out."

"That's the next Snake Plissken movie - Escape from Newton!"

"Instead of Orion the Hunter, it's Orion the Pimp Daddy!"

"Wolves can swim. I saw a movie -"
-- "Swims With Wolves?"

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