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The Flaming Crayfish's House of Gaming Quotes

National Lampoon's Alternate European Vacation

"A shadow passes over Esther."
-- "Esther, duck!"
"It's not a duck, that's a griffin."

"I'm flexible."
-- "Morally or physically?"
"Both."

December 2: Andy drops a die in his drink.

"Basically, it's like the Hoover Dam burst and she's trying to fix it with three little twigs."

James gets pissy about people trying to steal his talismans.
Andy: "Hey, Liz, I have one word for you: 'Sedative'!"
James: "Hey, Russell, I have one word for you - no, more than one word. 'Give me back the talisman you stole from me you bastard'!"

"I can make myself strong with Life? I was just growing plants and shit!"

"I need you to help me move this rock."
-- "Okay. (turns to GM) I move this rock."

"I have a motion on the table to give the Stew-man some talisman-lovin'."

"Everyone, pull out your talismans or draw them if you're not willing to take them out."
-- "Dmitri, better unrope them from your nads."

Liz describes a Mind effect.
"It's like someone massaging your penis."

"I think that we should all take an oath."
-- "Pinky swear!"

"We ask for supplies."
-- "I have nothing."
"Nothing? You're fucking King!"

"Beware the other three guardians ... they are not to be trusted ... I smell a banana."

Later, we reread that last quote.
"That sums up Mike's campaign right now."

"May I offer you something?"
-- "Pants."

"And what of your mother?"
-- "I believe she died before I was born ... oh no --"
"MIKE!! You said it again!"

"Although Cain was powerful, his death was a great setback to him."

"Only through the help of ... name, name ..."
-- "Jeremy Irons."

"I need a name for the sorceress."
-- "Annette Funicello."

"Everyone, guard your nipples!"

"What's Marco again?"
-- "A lion."
"A lion that lives in the sea. Real smart, Mike."
-- "Maybe it's a sea lion!"

"Cathy - you reappear and you're holding Eric's hand."
-- "And the rest of him, right?"

Russell is swayed by a beautiful woman. His girlfriend is amused.
"Ah, my weak-minded sex slave."
-- "Hey, no Mind and a 6 in Resources. I can see why you keep him!"

Mike describes Andy's out-of-body experience.
"You're sort of disembodied, which is the nature of an out-of-body experience."

"I have dots in Cosmology!"
-- "No, not Cosmetology."

"Why are we bringing Eric along?"
-- "He's my brother, you asswipe!"
"... why are we bringing you along?"
-- "'Cause I've got wings! And I'm sleeping with Russell!"

"The prime has a sour feeling."
-- "Sour Patch Prime!"

"The smoke is thick, but pungent."
-- "That's to hide the odor of FETID CORPSES!!!"

"We found the missing member's missing member!"

"That is fortunate, for I do not think that I could win, nor do I think that you would ..."
-- "Lose?"

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